High Hopes: The inspiration and meaning.

Despite writing the song only 5 months ago, the inspiration behind High Hopes actually started a very long time ago.
For the past 6 years, my biggest fear growing up was, what I was going to do with my life? If my dreams didn't happen, what was my back-up plan?

This horrible question kept me awake countless nights and caused me horrible stress and anxiety and to be honest, it still does some days.

I've noticed that we live in a society that causes us to put way too much pressure on ourselves. By the time you enter college, you are expected to have an idea of "what you want to do for the rest of your life".

For me, I had no idea and to be honest, I'm 22, graduating with my associates, and still have no idea.

This was the whole reason I wrote High Hopes. The song is about how we are expected to pick something, go to college and stick with it for life.
"Pick your poison and your fate, Make a choice and lay to wait."

So now that you know my inspiration, I have two challenges for you: 

First, I challenge you all to go take another listen to High Hopes

Second, I challenge you to share your growing up struggles with me in the comments! :)

What Inspired Me

The best thing about being an artist is we all have our own stories on how we got started or what pushed us to be who we are. We then tell our stories through our art, each song or piece shows a different side of who we are and what we've been through and that is amazing.

In my last post I shared my story on how I got started with you all, If you missed it click here. Now I want to share with you my influences, not just other artists but things in my life that have tried to stop me, pushed on forward, inspired me, or despite everything didn't stop me.

My first taste of live music: I was 7 years old, my local home school group of holding a Halloween party in the parks and rec community center. They were showing live acts all through the night of the other kids from the group but one in particular I remember to this day. There was about six kids up on stage in animal make up putting on a short play. I'll be honest, it wasn't the best show ever, but what caught my eye was when they all burst into song. Now don't get me wrong, they didn't have voices of angels, in fact you really shouldn't expect much have a group of 7 year old untrained kids singing. But I had never seen any live music before in my life and all I could think was, "I want that, I want to be doing that."  That is what got my into theater.

Music from a young age: Growing up in a home schooled house with my mom and four brother was a bit crazy. But one thing I remember when I think back was there was already music playing. No matter what we were doing my mom always had music blaring through the house. 

Now despite what you might thing, the music we listened to wasn't old timey stuff like the beetles. No, my mom loved Alternative Rock, Nickel back, Maroon 5, Plain white T's, Green day, Linkin Park, Avril Lavigne. That was my childhood and yes most of the time it was inappropriate music for a 8, 6, 10, 13 year old to be listening to, especially the song, "Crazy Bi*ch" from Buckcherry. But we had no idea what it meant so I guess it's alright. This influenced my love of music till this day, my heart and soul will always belong to Alternative Rock.

You suck: Being an artist means taking a risk, and just because some people make it seem easy doesn't mean it's not a tough job. You would not believe how many times I've been told, "You suck". Sadly, this wasn't by kids or teens either. I am talking about grown adults but I never let this stop me. There will always be someone who doesn't like your music but for every one person who doesn't, there are three who love it.

My first public performances: I have video of almost every single time I have preformed live, yes even the horrible ones where I butcher a piano, on stage, with an audience. The other videos I have, I can't even watch because they are so cringe worthy! But the good thing is, it let's me see how far I have really come. 

So I hope this post shared a little light that artist have it tough too. Despite everything we will always have haters and sometimes little things can influence us so much!

The Beginning of My Dream

The Beginning of My Dream:

I started writing songs at the age of three, of course at this time, they were all about my love for cats. As I grew older, they began more complex and I started trying to record myself using audacity. Now I wasn't a trained singer so at the time, I didn't understand why it always sounded so whiney and screechy. So I spent more and more time practicing and learning hoping to make my voice sound good. 

At this time, my oldest brother had just gotten really good at playing guitar, he had made his first song and asked me to write some lyrics for it. I was 7, when I wrote my first real song, Free to be.  I'll admit that till this day it is still one of my favorite songs I have ever written.

I began taking singing lessons at the age of 13 when I discovered my local theater was going to have auditions for musicals. I quit after a year when my teacher told me we could only learn musical pieces. I realized musicals weren't my passion and I really wanted to learn pop music.

Years went by where I taught myself to keep singing despite the lack of a teacher, I preformed in Les Miserable the musical where I had met my first boyfriend. The jerk cheated on my and broke my heart at the age of 16. 

I was crushed, to distract myself I began messing around with my piano and before I realized it, I had written my first hate song called, How Weird (which was a play on word for my ex's name). It was the only thing that actually made me feel better, pouring my entire soul into music. I showed this song to my mom and she was shocked at my skills. This awoke my passion, fire, and love, for singing and songwriting and from there I began putting all my time and effort into music.

I took back up singing lessons with a teacher that broaden my love all different kinds of music and pushed me to be the best. I learned my piano skills sucked and decided to buy my first guitar and learn on my own.

I have never had a guitar lesson in my life and I have written over 200 since and preformed at way to many open mics, concerts, festivals, and benefits.

Till this day, I practice singing and songwriting for over an hour each day and my love for music continues to grows with each breath as I try to achieve my dream of living off my music.

10 Reasons Cats are Purrfect

There are these magical creatures in the world that bring joy and happiness without really having to do anything, Cats. They are amazing just being themselves and with little to no effort steal our hearts away. So here are the 10 reason cats are purrfect!

1. Cat's use purring as a method of self-healing.

That's right, these little cuties use purring as a way to calm themselves and their purr vibrates at a frequency that heals!

2. They know where you are at all times.

Cat's have scary good hearing, so before you even enter the house, they know you're there. They are sneaky little ninja's, they will hide in your room and just stare at you until you notice them!

3. They can't see below their noses, which is why they might miss food right below them.

It's not that they can't look down to see if there is food, it's just that they feel they shouldn't have to.

4. They gain instant respect from other creatures.

That's right! These frisky little cats gain instant respect, they put everything in it's place and show who's boss. (Them)

5. Boxes are to cats as bubble wrap is to humans.

Just like when you see a long strip of bubble wrap, you can't help but pop one...or two...or a million. It's just too hard to resist. Well, cats feel our struggle, if there is a empty box just laying there, how could they not sit in it, sleep in it, or even attack you from it? It's just nature.

6. If they fit, they sleep.

Cat's will completely surprise you with the places they decide to take a nap, maybe it's the top of a shelf, in our shoe box, in the bathroom sink, or even on your laptop keyboard. Trust me, it would not be the first time in cat history!

7. The fuzzy fur on the inside of their ears is called, "ear furnishings" which helps to insulate the ear and keeps out dirt, bugs and really loud sounds.

Isn't this a crazy fact? And here I thought it was just one of the things that make these little creatures so more beautiful.

8. Cat's sleep so much because their body releases a growth hormone only during their sleep, so by the time a cat is 9 years old, it will have only been awake for 3 years of it's life.

After learning this little tidbit, I started to think of the fact that I normally sleep for 12 hours. This just means that I have only been awake for 10.5 years and as my brother put it, "That makes so much sense."

9. If a cat kneads you, you're now it's mother and it owns you.

Kittens learn to knead as a way to get milk from their mommies, but someone discovered that this little act to their owner just means they are showing you, they own you!

10. You will learn to love the abuse.

All in all, these little furry creatures may bite, scratch, run away, and pee on your pillow when you make them mad. But at the end of the day, you will quickly learn you can't live without their abuse.

Advice: To poof or not to poof?

I had a friend come to me last week asking for advice. She had started going out with this guy who seemed great but while she did like him, he was being to much for her to handle, they fought over the smallest things, and she always felt like she had to over-explain everything to him. So she asked, "Is it okay to poof?".

So to answer this question, let's start with the term "poof". This is a slang term that means to disappear without saying or explaining anything. Obviously, this is a very hurtful thing that leaves the victim in the dark, "Did I do something? Is she mad? Did her phone break? Is she dead?".

Now with this being said, is there really ever a time when disappearing without a word is okay? The simple answer is yes, there can be many reasons that straight up poofing is okay. Such as an abusive relationship, if the partner is someone you don't feel safe around, or if they are legitimately creepy.

To poof in a normal day to day relationship, probably isn't the best approach one should take. Some people take this kind of action for many reasons. They don't know how to break the news so they avoid it altogether, there is a hurtful reason behind the poofing and they don't want to explain in fear of hurting the person, it has worked for them in the past, or maybe they didn't even think you were that close to begin with.

Nevertheless, One should never choose poofing as a way to not hurt someone's feelings, because this will actually hurt more than just telling them it isn't working out. It gives the other person some closure so that their mind isn't wondering all over the blame, which is really the kindest thing you can do under these circumstances.

So in conclusion, "No, it's not okay to poof. Be kind enough to at least tell them you're leaving."

My first amp Fishman Loudbox Mini

I was so excited when I first came across this amp. It was about seven months ago, I was looking for the perfect amp that was cheap and would allow me to play small gigs. This was on sell for $350 in set that included a mic, mic stand, clip on tuner, amp cover, and of course the Fishman Loudbox Mini. I saved up every last cent and right after Christmas it went on sell again, So I bought it. Since this is my first amp, I don't really have the experience to compare to other amps but I can tell you what I thought about from a newbie perspective. To start off, after spending hours trying to find cheap amps, this set from Sweetwater.com was completely amazing for the price. I paid $329.99 for the set and it was shipped within two days for free. It was amazingly packed in Styrofoam and tons and tons of bubble wrap and they also sent me a little bag of candy!

Size

It's an adorable little amp and very manageable to move around! If you have to bring it long distances I suggest lugging it around in a suit case because it fits perfectly!

Quality

I was amazed when I finally turned it on, I was sitting beside the amp and it made me second guess if it was turned on because I heard no feedback. I had my mom stand on the other side of the room and she said it sounded amazing, loud, and very clear. This is a plus because if you've ever heard your feedback while playing it tends to mess you up, but since there was no feedback it felt like I was playing live while others were still able to hear me loud and clear.

Settings

There is an input for both your guitar and a microphone along with individual settings for both.

• Guitar:
• Phase - Button
• Gain
• Low
• Mid
• High
• Reverb
• Chorus - High-Mid-Low

• Mic:
• Gain
• Low
• High
• Reverb
• Master Volume

These settings let you have a lot of flexibility in how you want to sound, it can make your guitar sound more country twang or more acoustic pop!

Special notes

1. Keep in mind this is an acoustic amp, it can't make your acoustic guitar sound like an electric!
2. It does not include to cable to connect your guitar to the amp, I had to buy one from guitar center which only cost $15 (because I wanted the longer cable)
3. If you want to hear the amp live click here for my original song the infection recorded on the Fishman LoudBox Mini

The plane ride of a lifetime

As you read this, I am 40,000 feet up in the air. Flying away from the only place I've ever called home. I'm leaving behind the people I've ever called my friends, people I used to call family, and my two stubborn-head brothers. I'm flying to a new life, a new home, a new year.

This all started six years ago, when my mom left on an airplane just like the one I'm on right now. Heading to a place with a man she was destined to fall in love with, little did she know this choice would not only change her entire world but it would also change two whole families for the better.
She came back from that trip with determination, to get out of her love-less marriage, to stand up to man who had bullied her, to battle for children, and to live a life with the man she loves.
From that day onward, she has always told us, one day I'm going to move to Washington and live with this man, I hope you'll all come with me. Who knew that day would come so soon?

I remember being thirteen-years old, with the dreams of me and my mom going to live in England so that I could go to Oxford University. It's crazy how much my life has changed, I'm now going my all to live my dream of singing.

I'm flying to not only a new home, but a new life, a new house, a new job with new people, friends, and family. When you leave the only place you've ever called home, it's scary, I'll admit but it also liberating, I can't even imagine what adventures are waiting for me on the other side of this plane ride.

With this move, not only does it being a whole new element to my life, people, new family, new home, and new temperatures, but also new opportunities! I have such high hopes for Washington State and I'm going to work so hard to make this new year an amazing and memorable one. The one goal I have for myself is, no more being afraid, making excuses, or letting fears take over. It's our time to not be afraid, get out and give it your all.

We can do this.